The Essential Guide to Caring for your vulva

Our bodies are incredible, but many vulva owners grow up with little to no education about how to care for their genitals. Worse, some of the information we do get is filled with shame, outdated myths, and harmful marketing gimmicks. This guide is here to clear the air—no shame, no fluff, just real talk about keeping your body healthy and happy.

1. Understanding Your Anatomy

Before we dive into hygiene, let's make sure we're all on the same page with terminology. Knowing your body is empowering and allows you to care for it properly.

• Vulva – The external part of the genitals, which includes everything below.

• Labia (Majora & Minora) – The outer and inner lips of the vulva, which provide protection and sensitivity.

• Mons Pubis – The soft, fatty tissue above the vulva, often covered in pubic hair.

• Vagina – The internal muscular canal leading to the cervix. (Fun fact: it's self-cleaning!)

• Perineum – The area between the vulva and anus, which is sensitive and prone to irritation.

• Anus – The opening where stool exits the body, which requires separate hygiene from the vulva.

2. Cleaning: What to Use & How to Use It

Your vulva is sensitive, and less is often more when it comes to cleaning. Here’s what you need to know:

✅ Use warm water and mild, unscented, pH balanced – The vulva (external) benefits from gentle washing, but the vagina (internal) cleans itself. Avoid harsh soaps, scented washes, and douches, as they can disrupt natural balance. There are cleansers on the market that do a great job cleaning without having to use soaps. A great one I love is (these are not considered “soap” because of the pH levels) This is one I love. I use it on only the parts where soap shouldn’t be used Love Wellness pH balancing cleanser. I have also heard good things about this one Good Clean Love Balance Feminine Wash

✅ How to wash – Use your hands (not loofahs or washcloths that can harbor bacteria). Gently cleanse the labia and folds, then rinse thoroughly with water.

🚫 Avoid douching – The vagina has its own self-cleaning system. Douching can disrupt natural flora, leading to infections.

🚫 No scented products – Fragranced washes, wipes, and sprays can irritate the skin and cause infections.

3. Toilet Habits: Are You Wiping Correctly?

How you clean up after using the bathroom plays a huge role in preventing infections.

✅ Wipe front to back – This prevents bacteria from the anus from coming into contact with the vulva.

✅Use a bidet - eliminate or reduce the use of toilet paper altogether. Better for you and better for the environment. After using a bidet, you can pat dry using these reusable toilet cloths and convenient wet bag to store the dirties until laundry day.

✅ Consider alternatives to toilet paper – Many toilet papers shed lint and can harbor bacteria. Unscented wet wipes or a bidet are great alternatives for better hygiene.

✅ Wash hands before and after – This reduces the spread of bacteria to sensitive areas.

4. Vaginal Flora & Why It Matters

Your vagina is home to millions of bacteria (in a good way!). A balanced vaginal microbiome helps prevent yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis.

✅ Probiotics help maintain balance – Eating yogurt, fermented foods, drinking Kombucha or taking probiotic supplements can support vaginal health. My absolute favorite probiotic to help with vaginal flora is Physician’s Choice Vaginal Probiotic and I can attest to the fact that it works. (I had my flora tested before using it and after). There are 4 strains of flora in the vagina!

✅ Let your vagina breathe – Tight clothing and synthetic underwear can trap moisture, leading to imbalances. Cotton underwear and going commando at night can help.

✅ Stay hydrated – Drinking plenty of water supports overall health, including vaginal hydration and function.

5. Cleaning After Sex

Sex can introduce bacteria and disrupt your natural balance. Good post-sex hygiene helps prevent infections.

✅ Pee after sex – This helps flush out bacteria and reduces the risk of UTIs.

✅ Wash hands before and after – Good hand hygiene protects both you and your partner.

✅ Rinse with warm water – If needed, gently cleanse the vulva with warm water after sex.

6. Busting Myths About Genital Hygiene

There’s a lot of misinformation out there—let’s set the record straight.

❌ Myth: The vagina should smell like flowers – Nope! Vaginas have a natural scent that changes with your cycle. A mild, musky odor is completely normal. What is not normal is a fishy odor (often after sex). This is an indication that a bacterial infection could be present and you should seek medical attention.

❌ Myth: Discharge is dirty – Healthy discharge is your body’s way of keeping things clean. Changes in color, texture, or smell might indicate an infection, but daily discharge is normal. Your discharge will change throughout your cycle (if you are a person that has a menstrual cycle)

❌ Myth: Vulvas and vaginas stink or smell bad – The stigma around vaginal odor has been largely driven by marketing designed to sell unnecessary products. The natural scent of a vulva is not bad; it’s just that—natural. Products that claim to make you smell like candy or fruit can cause irritation and infections, and they are not necessary. If your partner expects you to smell or taste artificially different, it might be worth questioning whether they truly appreciate and respect your body as it is. Those who genuinely enjoy oral sex appreciate the natural scent and taste of their partner’s body. Your vulva is not the problem—the shame around it is.

Final Thoughts: Ditch the Shame, Embrace Your Body

Your vulva and vagina are incredible parts of your body that deserve care, respect, and accurate information. There is no shame in learning how to take care of yourself, and doing so can help you feel more comfortable, confident, and healthy.

If you have any concerns or persistent issues, don’t hesitate to reach out to a healthcare provider. Your health matters, and you deserve to feel good in your body!

*when you purchase products from the links I’ve shared in this blog it helps me keep my lights on and my dogs fed. Thank you for clicking!